A solo trip to St Paul de Vence

Last year, I had a moment of madness and decided to book myself a trip to the very pretty walled town of Saint Paul de Vence. I was scrolling through Pinterest and I saw this Airbnb 'La Miette' and immediately started researching it. When I realised it was affordable and available for a few nights in September, I booked some flights and thought no more of it.

Now this might be no big deal to some, but I struggle with agoraphobia which I am being treated for, but this means that going to a crowded place, a place I don't know, being trapped on an aeroplane, being far from home are all massive triggers for me. 

But this trip was going to be sink or swim, I had been given some structure around how to handle my anxiety and I am someone who loves to travel so this trip was a real test and this blog post will be more dedicated to trips for solo and anxious travel.

Saint Paul de Vence is a very small, medieval hilltop village located around 30 minutes from Nice airport. You can either get an uber/taxi, hire a car or take the bus for a few Euro, which is what I did.

But lets start at the beginning. My flight was early and the airport was going to be my first trigger. I don't like crowded places and it has been years since I had travelled alone, so I made sure I arrived in plenty of time and had a plan of what I wanted to do when I got there, which was to get breakfast! When I'm not familiar with a place I google it before hand so I can recognise it when I am there and it feels more like a place I know.

The second trigger for me is the flight itself, I loathe being stuck on a vessel, flying is easier for me than the tube but I panic that I cant get out/the plane will crash/there will be terrorists on board. My therapist gives me a 'three column exercise' to do where you write down the situation, then what you think will happen, then what actually happened. I have done this for a while and it teaches you that its never as bad as you think and this has helped me massively. Once we had taken off, I was fine.

The flight was short, I had my headphones, books and magazine so I was good to relax, I cant sleep on planes as they are so noisy and I even refused to order a Bloody mary as I wanted to arrive sober and clear headed.

When I landed (I had only taken hand luggage) I headed through customs and then had my first hurdle; find the bus stop. This was something I had googled already but I had to get a tram from the terminal to the other terminal and then leave the airport. This caused a bit of a panic but it was no drama; the buses were regular and I knew if there was an issue I could always take a taxi.

I took a photo of the bus timetable so I could count the stops and know when I needed to get off but the bus had a loudspeaker which announced the next stop.

When I arrived, I was too early to check in to my airbnb so I went out for lunch and I felt euphoric! Here I was, in France eating delicious food and I had got here all by myself! Me, someone who at one point couldn't leave my house to walk down the road to the village shop. I was super proud and felt like I had main character energy.

Sadly, this came crashing down a few hours later, for a mixture of different reasons but mainly because I was so tired and I found it difficult to find places to eat. I hadn't made a reservation anywhere and I went to a few places but was told they were closed, not serving food or I would have to eat inside (it was far too hot to sit inside). 

Anyway, I eventually found somewhere and then went home to my airbnb and I started to write a list of things that I would tell myself if I did a trip like this again and for anyone else who might find this useful so here goes...

Make sure you have printed copies of everything in case your phone runs out of battery or cannot connect to 4G. This could be maps, tickets, confirmation of bookings etc.

Take a battery pack with you and charge your phone wherever you can. Your phone is a lifeline so be sure to keep it charged!

Download Google maps so that you can view it offline

Take a laptop/books with you so you can fill your evenings with things to do

Familiarise your location with google / Trip advisor. I find it really helpful when I'm in a new place to recognise landmarks etc

Ensure you data roaming will work

Download the uber app

I speak basic French but I think if you don't know another language, choose a place where English is widely spoken

Take cash and card, monzo cards are free to use abroad. Dont assume that apple pay is accepted and don't rely on cash in case the ATM is out of order

Have an emergency fund in case something happens and you just need to throw some money at the problem

If checking in luggage, take a spare change of clothes in your hand luggage in case your bags don't arrive

Learn some phrases in the local language. Where I was, everyone spoke English but I chose to start the conversation in French as I know they appreciate it if you try to make an effort

If where you are staying is hot, see if you can get a guest pass to a hotel with a pool (or book accommodation with a pool!). On my second day in France, I was struggling to leave my airbnb do to anxiety. It was too hot to simply walk around all day and I was nervous about going out to eat due to what happened the night before. It would have been perfect if I could have lazed poolside all day with my book. Definitely doing this next time!

Let people know where you are going and share your location if necessary. I told my friends I was away and feeling nervous and they all offered to facetime me if I needed it which was great to know I could speak to loved ones.

If you have an early flight and cant check into your accommodation until later on (I couldn't check in until 4pm and I arrived at 12pm) have a plan of what you will do. A long lunch is a good as you don't want to be trawling your luggage around.

If you feel nervous about going out to eat alone (you really shouldn't no-one cares!) then schedule a call with a friend or take a book with you. Try and make as many reservations as you can, you don't want to be wandering around in the heat getting hangry.

Dress appropriately, as a female traveler you don't want to attract unwanted attention.

Also don't drink too much you will just be vulnerable and its not fun.

Make sure you know the local emergency number.

Pressing the side button on your iphone 5 times contacts your emergency SOS in your contacts.

Pack home comforts like tea bags. Find a local supermarket and stock up on milk, water, snacks etc.

I sometimes just cant leave the house for no reason at all, so I would suggest doing this first thing whilst you are already out, in case you can't do it the next day. 

Look up places to go that are free like parks, churches, museums. You can spend hours here and not feel pressured to leave like in a restaurant.

If crowded places cause anxiety, get up early and wander around before peak times. Where I was staying was very touristy and was popular with day trippers, plus the midday heat was too much so I preferred to go out first thing (to get fresh pastries!) and early evenings.

Download podcasts. tv series and books for your evenings in case your accommodation only has foreign tv.

Don't walk around at night with headphones in and during the day avoid doing anything that makes you look like a tourist.

One thing I did that helped was to write lists of things I wanted to achieve, whether it was seeing places to photograph or going for coffee. I really like ticking off lists no matter how small the task was. Don't beat yourself up if you couldn't do it, if you need to stay in that's fine.

I felt like a wally taking photos of myself but I knew I would be annoyed if I hadn't captured some moments. I realise for the non bloggers this might not be important!

Prep for solo travel before you go away, visit coffee shops alone and get used to your own company.

Try and do as much as you can when you feel up to it, you might wake up then next day and just want to stay inside.

Travel light, I had to haul a small suitcase up a steep cobbled hill, I was so grateful I didn't have much more to carry.

only do what you truly want to do, don't visit places just because you saw it on social media. You cant see and do it all, so stay true to yourself.

Don't rely on Google for opening times, call the venue to double check

This trip had a lot of up and downs for me, I'm so proud of myself for doing it, but it wasn't 'fun'. For some reason I found eating out really challenging, I'm not sure if this was because I was dining alone but it made me dread going out for food. One example, on the Friday night I walked into a restaurant that looked very much open but was told that they weren't. I called them the next day to reserve a table for lunch and thought all was good until I turned up and they said that they didn't have any tables for me. It was odd and annoying but maybe I was just unlucky.

On the Saturday when I was delaying leaving the house, I didn't have a plan and wasn't sure what to do, I just said 'go and get an ice cream and see how you feel'. I pushed myself to leave, with the incentive of food, and ended up staying out for a few hours and felt so much better for it.

That's pretty much it! Whilst I'm not sure if I would do another solo trip abroad, I have booked a few solo staycations with Rosie, which I am looking forward to.

I would highly recommend visiting St Paul de Vence, you could do it in a day or stay one or two nights, It's very pretty and filled with boutiques and restaurants.

What are your trips for solo travel?